Saturday, December 17, 2005


It's out in the open now: George Junior honestly seems to believe he can do anything in his power to make eveyone in the world obey his every command. He is send by the Almighty to fight the Devil and his Worshippers by any means he sees fit.

In the old days such a person was called a paranoid dictator. Nowedays he is known as President of the United States of America. Civil Rights? Treaty? Democracy? Innocent? George Bush Junior does not know the expressions...

Just the other day Eva, Dayna and Ferdinand (and a lot of other kids in this country worldwide known as "Holland") celebrated Sinterklaas and soon they will be celebrating Christmas, perhaps the weirdest festive season of the year. We promise to be nice to eachother for two whole days. Why not be nice to your relatives or even complete strangers for the rest of the year? Is this what Jesus had in mind when he spoke, some 2000 years ago? I personally seriously doubt it.

Friday, December 09, 2005


How much money a year is spend on fighting terrorism? How many people a year die of terrorist attacks?
How much money a year is spend on fighting poverty? How many people a year die of hunger?

Something's terribly wrong in this world...

Saturday, November 26, 2005


Why do we assume all creatures need oxygen to live?

Yesterday marked my son's tenth birthday...

Friday, November 11, 2005

Sint Maarten

Today parts of the country celebrated the feast of "Sint Maarten". It's all about thinking of the poor and sharing what you've got. Children go past the houses with homemade lanterns and are sometimes dressed up. They sing songs and demand from the inhabitants that they share some of their wealth in the form of a bit of candy or a tiny sum of money. People who refuse to give something are subjected to namecalling through songs. Earlier this evening I had my daughter on the phone and it took her over twenty minutes to sum up the candy she and her sister had obtained. Just now I returned from picking up my son from the house of a friend with whom he had stalked the streets. They're happy. And so am I...

Your Seduction Style: Au Natural

You rank up there with your seduction skills, though you might not know it.
That's because you're a natural at seduction. You don't realize your power!
The root of your natural seduction power: your innocence and optimism.

You're the type of person who happily plays around and creates a unique little world.
Little do you know that your personal paradise is so appealing that it sucks people in.
You find joy in everything - so is it any surprise that people find joy in you?

You bring back the inner child in everyone you meet with your sincere and spontaneous ways.
Your childlike (but not childish) behavior also inspires others to care for you.
As a result, those who you befriend and date tend to be incredibly loyal to you.

Saturday, November 05, 2005


Most people already knew it but now it is a scientific fact, proven by Dresdner Kleinwort Wasserstein: Having materialistic goals may lead to dissatisfaction with life and even to mental disorders such as paranoia. People who spend their money on experiences rather than objects are happier overall. Nice.

I second that because although being an actor at The Amsterdam Dungeon does not pay all that much, I'm now much happier than when I was a bookkeeper and made almost twice as much. And thanks to my new job I got to take my kids to Sealife Scheveningen where they explain a lot about life in the Northsea. Entertaining as well as educational. On top of that I've got a great bunch of colleagues and a boss who actually listens to the people from the workfloor. And to be honest: I just love scaring the wits out of German tourists...;-)

Friday, October 14, 2005


>>I felt that I now understood the new regime: absolute freedom..except that any official from dogcatcher to supreme potentate could give any orders whatever to any private citizen at any time. So it was "freedom" as defined by Orwell and Kafka, "freedom" as granted by Stalin and Hitler, "freedom" to pace back and forth in your cage.<<

Excerpt taken from "The cat who walks through walls" by Robert A. Heinlein. It sums up rather well what this world is coming to: we are free within the ever tighter becoming bounderies the governments lay upon us."War on communism"; "war on drugs" and "war on terror" seem nothing more than excuses to gain further control of decent law-abiding citizens.

When will we, the people, regain power and take back control over our lives again?
Perhaps my grandchildren will live to tell of the days people lived in made-up freedom and be truly free. Like dolphins are free, only bound by the laws of nature.

Tuesday, October 04, 2005


Today my daughter Eva turned five. Reason for celebrations, fun, presents and laughter. Nothing beats the sound of young children having fun...not even the sound of a German tourist screaming in agony when you show him a torture-instrument...

As you may have guessed I've got a new job. I'm now officially an actor working for The Amsterdam Dungeon.
We won't officially open till the 16th and the Grand Openinge will take place the 31st of october: Halloween!

Ferdinand had his first official geography-test in school today and yesterday he started working as volunteer in a third world-shop near our home, selling goods that are benificial to the manufacturer and not all the salespeople between them and the consumer. Good job!

Not from everyone you can state he or she is doing a good job. Take Senator William Bennett who lost his job after he suggested the crimerate in America could be lowered would there be less black people. Well, less senators would say things that hurt people if you would hang 'em on a hook by the base of their skull...

Saturday, September 10, 2005


Why hasn't Osama Bin Laden been caught yet?
Here's a theory.

Tomorrow it's 9/11. Reason enough to dig up old conspiracy-theories and invent new ones. Some sound very plausible and others are just rubbish. Are all those different theories facturized by the governments to confuse us and distract us from what's really going on?

For the victims it does not matter. What does matter is that George Junior since not so long is now officially a dictator: he received a mandate from Congres stating that he may do "whatever he thinks is needed to stop terrorism". Basicaly he could decide to stay on a spresident after this term. Now he already discards the Geneva Convention "because it's needed to stop terrorism". Not only in Guantanamo Bay but now also on American soil
he holds people in jail without charging them.

Friday, September 09, 2005


Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff (movielink) has an explenation as to why the National Guard was not immediately deployed:"They only get deployed within 24 hours when there's a huge emergency".

Strangely enough I did not see rich white people when I tuned in to see images of people who are hit by Katrina. This fact was also noticed by Michael Moore and he wrote an open letter about it to George Junior.
(Via Janice Pierre)

Distraction from all this for me came from my mother's 70th birthday, thursday a week ago. The day itself she took me and my son out to eat Chinese and sunday she celebrated with the rest of the family, including my daughter. Wednesday I took my son to his very first baseball-game ever: China against Cuba, leading to the next round in the 2005 worldchamionships. At the end of the second inning Cuba lead bij 6-0 but China fought back to 8-7. Cuba finally won by a margin of four: 12-8.

Friday, September 02, 2005


Read this and weep...

(Taken from

Thursday, September 1st, 2005
10:46 pm
The Real News
The following is the result of an interview I just conducted via cell phone with a New Orleans citizen stranded at the Convention Center. I don't know what you're hearing in the mainstream media or in the press conferences from the city and state officials, but here is the truth:

"Bigfoot" is a bar manager and DJ on Bourbon Street, and is a local personality and icon in the city. He is a lifelong resident of the city, born and raised. He rode out the storm itself in the Iberville Projects because he knew he would be above any flood waters. Here is his story as told to me moments ago. I took notes while he talked and then I asked some questions:

Three days ago, police and national guard troops told citizens to head toward the Crescent City Connection Bridge to await transportation out of the area. The citizens trekked over to the Convention Center and waited for the buses which they were told would take them to Houston or Alabama or somewhere else, out of this area.

It's been 3 days, and the buses have yet to appear.

Although obviously he has no exact count, he estimates more than 10,000 people are packed into and around and outside the convention center still waiting for the buses. They had no food, no water, and no medicine for the last three days, until today, when the National Guard drove over the bridge above them, and tossed out supplies over the side crashing down to the ground below. Much of the supplies were destroyed from the drop. Many people tried to catch the supplies to protect them before they hit the ground. Some offered to walk all the way around up the bridge and bring the supplies down, but any attempt to approach the police or national guard resulted in weapons being aimed at them.

There are many infants and elderly people among them, as well as many people who were injured jumping out of windows to escape flood water and the like -- all of them in dire straights.

Any attempt to flag down police results in being told to get away at gunpoint. Hour after hour they watch buses pass by filled with people from other areas. Tensions are very high, and there has been at least one murder and several fights. 8 or 9 dead people have been stored in a freezer in the area, and 2 of these dead people are kids.

The people are so desperate that they're doing anything they can think of to impress the authorities enough to bring some buses. These things include standing in single file lines with the eldery in front, women and children next; sweeping up the area and cleaning the windows and anything else that would show the people are not barbarians.

The buses never stop.

Before the supplies were pitched off the bridge today, people had to break into buildings in the area to try to find food and water for their families. There was not enough. This spurred many families to break into cars to try to escape the city. There was no police response to the auto thefts until the mob reached the rich area -- Saulet Condos -- once they tried to get cars from there... well then the whole swat teams began showing up with rifles pointed. Snipers got on the roof and told people to get back.

He reports that the conditions are horrendous. Heat, mosquitoes and utter misery. The smell, he says, is "horrific."

He says it's the slowest mandatory evacuation ever, and he wants to know why they were told to go to the Convention Center area in the first place; furthermore, he reports that many of them with cell phones have contacts willing to come rescue them, but people are not being allowed through to pick them up.

I have "Bigfoot"'s phone number and will gladly give it to any city or state official who would like to tell him how everything is under control.

Addendum: Bigfoot just called to report that "they" (the authorities) are cleaning up the dead bodies at the Convention Center right now.

Friday, August 26, 2005


My thoughts today are with the people in Paris who's appartment-building burnt down, leaving 3 adults and 14 children dead. Unfortunately these things happen. It actually doesn't matter to the victims how it could have happened: was it an accident, was it lit?

On the other hand I don't feel real guilty that my life is going smoothly in the direction of good times ahead:
Last wednesday I auditioned for the part of actor at the soon to be opened Amsterdam Dungeon. The next day I was summoned at a workshop to see how we would perform as a group. Whatever the result: at least I've learned a few things I didn't know before and had two enjoyable afternoons in which I got to know some interesting people.

My son is at my moms for a night and a day for I need to work tomorrow as entertainer at a dance-event called Mysteryland. So should you happen to be in the neighbourhood of the Haarlemmermeer (not far from Amsterdam), join us at the Minibar!

Wednesday, August 17, 2005


My son and I spend the last week in the city of love: Paris. We actually lived there as we where able to use the appartment of a friend of ours. We did all sorts, including going to Versailles and walk through the gardin of Louis XIV. We also visited Napoleon's las resting place and the largest fleemarket in Europa: Clignancourt. We didn't succeed in getting there last year but this year we managed to find the Moulin Rouge so I'll gess my son has to see the film now, the one with Ewon McGregor and Nicole Kidman that is. We will also see the film feauturing a girl called Amelie Poulain because we might recoignize some of the streets where it is filmed.
For the full story on our trip to Paris, read my Dutch weblog.

Too bad nobody filmed the killing of Jean Charlez de Menenez, right after the London bombings.
The Brazilian electricien was shot dead after alledgedly having fled from the police who tracked him after he had left a suspicious house. He looked suscpicious, left a suspicious house, wore a suspiciously thick jacket and he fled for the police. Those were the apparent reasons for shooting him throught the head at point blank range.
According to a new report, however, this was not the story.
According to the new revelations mr. Menendez was not running (a man runing from the police does not stop to pick up a copy of a complementary newspaper), was not wearing a thick jacket (unless you call light denim thick) and was not shot on the run (unless he was racing through his mind).

The London Police now has some explaining to do...

Wednesday, July 27, 2005


This week summercamp started. The very first day it rained all day long and amazingly enough not all parents had given their kids a raincoat for the journey, so quite a few kids had to stay in their tents whilst others enjoyed themselves building huts and roling of the dunes...
Next week I'll join the gang as a volunteer. Since I officially stopped working with children this is a way for me to at least work with them occassionally.

My jobhunt is still going very well although the fish seem to refuse to bite.
At least being unemployed gives me time to wash the drapes and stick a five year supply of photo's into albums.

And although according to some "specialists" Amsterdam can be blown up any minute, I can't be bothered.
In the end we'll all die, anyway and as long as more people die of starvation, old age, the flew and falling of the steps whilst hanging up the drapes, I shall not worry about so called "terrorists". One has more to fear of people thinking you are a terrorist. Look at my country. As a terrorist-counter measure they implemented a system ths Nazi's liked very much and Jozef Stalin used to control his subjects: The obligation to wear identification at all times. Although our government is more strict than old Joe: Everyone over fourteen should carry an ID, under Stalin the minimum age was sixteen.
In the past six months over 35,000 people were fined because they couldn't show one.
Not one terrorist was caught. Not a single other criminal was brought of his/her plans.
Only 35,000 law-abiding citizens got harrassed.

Oh, and in case you wonder what this Rocky Horror Show-thing is I keep putting in my posts:
Here's a short summary.

Wednesday, July 13, 2005


Today I've been baskin' in the summersun in our community-garden. After spending an hour or so in the hamoc I decided to make use of our jacuzzi. Delightful! Especially since I know all my London friends are accounted for after the dreadfull attack on the people's sense of security, last thursday.
Luckily the British are reasonably stubborn and won't let a few idiots change the way they choose to live. Hooray for the British! And although I tried to think of the thousands who die of hunger each day in Africa and the slaughter of dozens of innocent people in places like Afghanistan and Iraq, this time the bombings came very close to the world I personally live in. I don't know 'bout you but when some lunatic tries to blow up friends of mine, I tend to get seriously ticked of.

This past weekend my godson Matthijs and his mother Marjan came to spend a weekend with us.
Behaving as tourists we went to Madame Tussauds, where I applied for a job the following day.
Despite my visitors the Rocky Horror cast-rehearsal went on as planned. Neighbour Johanna came to see her son on sunday-morning and this time stayed for about twenty minutes. She's getting worse, I'm afraid.
Her illness (schizofrenia) is getting the better of her. To our son it has become normal that his friends point at a lady picking up sigaret-butts from the street abd he replies:"That's my mum..."
I guess it bothers me that he doesn't seem bothered.
Is it his defense-system or is there something else going on?

Friday, July 01, 2005


Holding the people of Kazaa accounted for the misuse of their product is like sueing mr. Colt for the deaths of thousands of peaple each year, being killed with a gun by their make.
Speaking of lilling: have you ever taken the War on Iraq IQ-test?
It's quite revealing, I can tell you.

Today I went to this cafe to say hello to Marieken after her three months stay in the US. It was fun seeing her again.
Last weekend I got to spend a few fantastic days with my son and daughter. The latter I picked up from school on friday and together we picked up her brother from afterschool. Amongst other things we went to the pool and overall we simply had a great time, filled with love and harmony.
You can tell my son is on his way to becoming a teenager. Every age has its advantages but sometimes I'd wish he was still small...
Ah well, I still have daughters who are quite young.

An advantage of being unemployed is the fact that I have more time to spend drinking coffee with my neighbours. This morning it was with neighbour Wynona and early in the evening it was with neighbour Angélique who also had stayed for dinner and was kind enough to look after my son whilst I was out for a drink.

Sometimes I feel very fortunate, leading such a great life!

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

European Constitution

New York City, United states — A New York Times article has uncovered that the White House has been rewriting the facts in scientific government reports about global warming. Bush' rejection of the Kyoto-treaty
apparently is a result of lobbying by the people from Exxon. What a surprise!

For those who have seen Star Wars III: Revenge of the Sith, read this alternative script. I think it's funny.

The bodies that empower "Europe" as world-power are now forced to come up with an alternative script for an European Constitution. Since next to the French also the Dutch said "no" to the treaty leading to a Constitution they will have to come up with a new one. The version that now stands talks too much about how legislation should be turned into practical laws. It deals with laws on the war of terror and other stuff that basically should not be part of a contitution. Let alone the rules concerning "a free and in every way liberal market on all fronts of the economy". I hate to see a liberal market in energy, education and healthcare. It wiil lead to no good, I promise you.
We can all see where the American constitutional right to bear arms has led to. No doubt it was very effective at the start of the new republic but it turns out to be seriously outdated. Even leading to a new law in Florida giving citizens the right to shoot someone "whenever they feel threatened". Sounds like anarchism to me...

Since the first of june I'm once again part of the army of National working force reserve. Unemployed, in other words. Not a bad timing, just before summer...;-)
So now I've got ome more time to spend with my kids and other loved ones.
On top of that I can now do all sort of chores in and around the house that have been lying around to be done for years.

Monday, June 06, 2005

According to mr. William Schultz, top man of the American division of Amnesty International, Guantanamo Bay is part of a system to be compared to the "Gulag" in the old days: a series of prisoncamps where torturing prisoners is more rule than exception. People favoring the Bush-administration call his accusation "Al-Qaida propaganda" which in itself is quite hilarious. To state that this terrorist group sponsors Amnesty International.
Unfortunately the group opposing mr. Schultz has yet to prove their statement.

Just finished my first week as temporarily unemployed person and I must say "so far, so good".
Writing application-letters still proves to be no problem. Of the 29 job-applications I've send out so far I've already received three responses: two turn-downs and one complaint of someone not being able to open the e-mail attachment...
I'll keep you posted.

Wednesday, May 25, 2005


Minnesota judge Jim Randall has declared that having encryption software installed on your computer proves you show criminal intent.
PgP-developer Phil Zimmerman thinks otherwise.
And rightfully so, in my opinion.
Judge Randall should than also call Bill Gates to the stands as his company Microsoft produces and distributes encryption tools, thus empowering criminals to do their nasty thing.
A lot of this software you will find on Mr. Gates's personal computer.

I suppose having a vault is than also a criminal offense? Apparently a lot of banks have got something to hide...
And you: do you lock your door? If so: what are you hiding?
Judge Randall would like to know...

Friday, May 06, 2005


To all you Timetravelers: this is your chance to attend the only ever Timetravelers-convention. Don't miss it!

Friday, April 29, 2005

I always feel a bit...I don't know...a bit...shameless when I unexpectedly receive visitors while I'm still in my undergarments. Heck, why should you get fully dressed on your day off and you spend most of the day just potting (a new word I learned today!)? Anyways: Sharon and Raquel, friends of my neighbour Angélique didn't stay very long as they were off to the Albert Cuypmarket and prepare themselves for Queensday.
Queensday is the yearly returning party to celebrate the Queen Mom's birthday. That day the whole of the country turns into one giant fleemarket and fairground. At night the party continues for the grown ups until the next morning. Except in Amsterdam where since a couple of years drinking in the streets on Queensday has not been made eaysier thanks to all kinds of new rules. It's even forbidden to start partying the night before, which had been the tradition for many years. Just imagine walking around the streets around three at night while you get yourself a Vietnamese eggroll and see people unrolling the carpets they will later display their attic-junk on? Listening to beginning bands and occassionally push away some drunk idiot who tries to impress your date by showing her his private parts...?

Aw well, things change but hopefully the wheather will not. Well, not until the day after tomorrow then. As I'm writing this is a very nice spring afternoon. Funny though: one day you walk around in your t-shirt and the next in your wintercoat. That's the Netherlands for you!

Hollywood filmmakers gladly accomodate the US military in order to obtain their help
in making their movies. Read the full story here:

And here's a happy story about obesity.
Apparently "only" a mere 100,000 Americans die from overweight every year. Earlier estimates spoke of over 400,000. Now that's a relief, isn't it?
My current overweigt is about 3 kilograms (or less than half a stone for those who prefer to deal inEnglish measurements). What's yours?

Should I ever visit the USA in the future again, I think I will skip visiting Florida. Suppose a citizen considers me to be lifethreatening? He or she can than shoot me on the spot thanks to a new law implemented by the Jeb Bush.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

Those of you interested in how and why the ways of the law have changed since 9/11 may want to read this here article.

If you're not interested in politics and other nasty stuff you might want to know that I'm slowly building up a father-daughter relationship with Dayna, Eva's younger sister. For years I was convinced somebody else was her biological dad but am now slowly coming to terms with the fact that's it's about 90 percent sure I've got two daughters and not only one.

That brings the total to three children being put on this world with a little help from yours truly.
As far's my job's concerned: after talks with my colleague, my direct superior, a psycho-therapist, a councellor and the company doctor, I've started working three days a week in stead of five. It gives me more time to study, more time for my kids and since the Dutch system makes sure I don't get less than someone on welfare it doesn't matter how many hours I work, moneywise. Hence this construction.

Within a year I plan to have a normal paying job again but will try to make it possible to work with kids once in a while just because I like doing it so much. Does that make sense?

Sunday, April 10, 2005

According to Colin Powell about 80 percent of White House officials is on drugs. Mostly steroids.
You can read about his allegations in his book: Pumped, Living Fast, Loose, And On The Juice During My Tumultuous DC Days—And Nights.

They asked me if I'd be interested in doing a panto this year around christmas. I told'em:"I'm single nowedays and my nine-year old son is a wee bit too young to stay home alone for nearly two months." The response was:"Congratulations!" Don't yo just love British humor?

My son, oldest daughter and I went to a local fair this morning and spend a little more than we should have...
We had fun, anyway.
Less fun is the fact that Eva has just been picked up by her mom and I just can't get used to saying goodbye to my little girl. I'm slowly starting to build up a relationship with her little sister who's probably mine since tests show "the other guy" is not her father. Although there have been more "other guys" I'd like to believe my ex when she says she's only had unsafe sex with "him" and me during our relationship. With all others she used precaution.
Now that's nice, isn't it?

Tomorrow I'm seeing my employer's social worker to talk about my future on the workfloor. With a colleague who's pushing me to look for another carier and a paycheck coming in while one from social security would show a higher amount I'm not really that motivated to work with kids anymore.

Any ideas about what course I should follow are more than welcome...

Monday, March 21, 2005

Excuse me if I'm wrong but if a human life is really so precious as a lot of people in the Terry Schiavo-case want us te believe, then why does America still holds on to the death penalty? Every human life is sacred, right? Unless of course mean George Junior decides differently.

He decides to kill thousands of innocent people in Afghanistan, Iraq and loads of other countries nobody ever heard of before the US dicovered oil in the ground. See here the sole reason why he hasn't send troops to Darfur yet.
On the other hand he decides that one particular human life should be saved.
Who appointed him god?

And can it be undone?

It was an old fashioned busy weekend, last weekend. Saturday our friend Daniëlle came to stay over.
Sunday her friend Deborah came to show us her new boyfriend Andrea. Neighbour Johanna made use of her richt to visit our son. The afternoon was for the first rehearsal in the new season of The Rocky Horror Picture Show with a few new castmembers. The evening was reserved for dinner at my mom's with her brother and his wife who had come over from the Chicago-region.


Saturday, March 12, 2005

Why do we kill people to show other people that killing people is wrong? I keep asking myself that question every single time I hear of people calling themselves Christians who say they favour this form of penalizing a human being.
With the bible in their hand they claim God himself aproves of this method of punishment. It says in the Bible (Leviticus 24:17) that "any man who willingly kills another man shoul be put to death." Or similar words. If that's the case, there god-given president should be long dead for giving the order to executions and even for giving the order to go to any extend to find Bin Laden and members of his group, including killing. But somehow I don't think pro-death penalty people think George Junior should be executed. He is above the law. Even above God's law. Right?

It also clearly states in the Bible "Thou shall not kill." Remember?

And since the Geneva Convention forbids prisoners to be tortured you simple ship them to countries like Jemen who haven't signed the rules for fair combat. Easy. Just ask George Junior. The guy became a Born Again Christian the moment his advisors told him it would be a good move should he want to run for governor.
Well, he pulled it off. Lucky him. Unlucky people of the world...

May God stand by them.

(By the way: above statement does not mean I'm a Christian, I just despice people who claim to be for personal gain. That's all.).

On a personal note: I've been down with the flew for about two weeks so unfortunately was too ill to go sleigh-riding with my kids. On top of that the docot claims I'm burn-out. Not amusing. I might even have to give up my job and choose to spend more time with my children. We'll see what the future holds for us.

Tuesday, February 22, 2005

Soon people will be speaking of a "Dutch Democracy" when they mean a country where the government does as it pleases without really listening to its people. Some years ago far more people voted for the Dutch Socialists: SP than for the Democratic Party D'66. Still the latter made it into the government seats in Parliament. Soom the Dutch people can vote in favour of or against the coming of a European Constitution. No matter if 90 percent of the people votes against, the government will respect the wishes of the people and proclaim a win for the new constitution. Like a boxer respects his opponent but still beats the .... out of him. Yeah.

In the same respect I can state that my opinion regarding my kids is fully respected. In the case of both kids and both their moms. In both cases, however, the ladies can do as they please and I will have to conform to their every wishes and whimps. My son's mom can state she will pay her son a visit, not show up an blame her illniss.
My daughter's mom can agree to the fact that I will pick up her daughter, not be there for the pick-up and blame her busy schedule as a busy mom with two kids.
Somehow I don't see that as fair.

Excuse me if I'm a bit down. It's just one of those

Sunday, February 13, 2005

I just never get used to saying goodbye. Every so often I hug my daughter goodbye without knowing when I will see her again. Today we mailed a drawing she made to her sister who has her third birthday coming tuesday.
This girl could be my daughter. Should I decide to recognize her as well I need to hurry while she's flexibel (e.i. young) enough to take the news and not be traumatised by it. My son was at a birthday-party yesterday so me and Eva had a couple of hours together.

Luckily there are people out there who support me while I struggle with work, study, being a single dad as well as a weekend-dad. With two custody-cases on my hands with two different ex-es concerning probably three different kids I'm busy enough as it is.

Perhaps I should take some time of,
First listen to what the boss has to say about the matter since my private situation is affecting my work.

Should you feel like ending it all in the way of this guy who planned with others to commit suicide on Valentine's Day, you might want to take a look here:
Pere Lachaise

Friday, February 04, 2005

There's a woman standing on the bridge. She mumbles to herself and occassionally shouts to the world. When you try to start a conversation she won't hear you. She lives in a world of her own.
Is it my world that's real or is it hers?

When you type the question "how to commit fraude" into the search-engine, the URL to my weblog shows up first. Kinda makes you wonder, doesn't it?

Every single time I say goodbye to my daughter I wonder when we will see her again. Somehow you just don't get used to the pain. Some other guy is posing as her dad whilst her mom lets me pay to play the role. She was the one who decided to spent her life with someone else. For years I was unaware of the existence of "the other guy". When I found out she was already pregnant with number two. So my daughter has a sister. But who's the real dad? My other ex still shares custody over our son so when something would happen to me (I die, for example...) she will be appointed legal guardian. Since she can't take care of herself due to her illness (she's a schizofrenic, paranoid borderline patient) "they" will look for a foster home. Rather than that I'd like for my best friend to be appointed the role of new parent but judges in this country still fail to look into every case as if they're dealing with individuals and not the categories "male" and "female". Stupid.

This weekend I will have my 10 year old godson as guest, with his mom. Monday I will be in serious talks about me possibly quiting the national workforce: When I would quit my job and take my son from afterschool, I would gain 150 euro's a month. Exactly the amount my ex (daughter's side) demands from me...

Pleasant dreams.

For now: tata!

Friday, January 28, 2005

Check this out!
It's real funny!

I'm on a tight schedule concerning "things to do" so if you'll excuse me: I'm off doing my paperwork!

Friday, January 21, 2005

A guide led me through a bun. We were plucking ourselves a way through the bread when we got in a chamber that looked
threatening. I asked the guide if he recognized a point in the ceiling that looked like a sort of fungus: brownish threads of biological material crawling allover. From it emerged a creature that rolled towards us. It's body was disc-shaped and it had at least six legs,
being little bigger than a common house-spider, which it also resembled.
The colours were mostly brown and black. It rolled towards us, circled around us and than away from us before returning, obviously curious. It overcame its fear and ran over my body. When I made swapping movements with my hands to chase it off it kind of changed into a butterfly-like creature, flew up and circled around me a few more times.

At the same time a female friend of mine was in danger. She was in an all white room with two plastic benches in the middle, back to back. Here and there laserbeams had been fired across the room. Most were red, some were green. Once emitted, the beams stayed. My friend already had a small fleshwound at her leg where one of the beams had hit her. More beams filled the room when you could see the creature emitting them: It seemed to be a baby's head in a half-round plastic yelow bowl. Whilst my friend crawled the room for her life she knew I was on my way to rescue her. At one point the baby-head stood on one of the benches to fire it's laserbeams from there. It lost balance and fell. Out of the now broken yellow bowl slipped a slimy oval and extremely large children's head. Suddenly the rest of the body had formed, wearing blue and red clothes. Now the being had evolved and could aim it's laserbeams more accurately.
When I entered the room my friend shouted to warn me for a laserbeam. I evaded two by climbing onto one of the couches.

And more dreams of mine you will find here. Above is one of the latest additions. Some people who've read it carefully suggested I might need some professional help...Maybe they're right. Anyways I was at the point of quiting my job this week because I can get more money from social benefits and if at the same time I end the contract for my son's afterschool and will have money left to pay for my ex which gives me a better chance to see my daughter more often. However, I than could be sued for breach of contract. On top of that my boy was ill. How was your week?

Did you see the pictures of Titan? Maybe it's time to migrate! For George Junior and his followers... How dare he speak of freedom while at the same time he deprives thousands of it!?
Privatising social security is a stupid idea. So is planning a war against Iran. Or against any country for that matter. We can achieve world-peace on a much simpler plane: try to make at least two people smile each and everyday and treat others as you want them to treat you. And keep at it! Don't give up when you say "Bless you!!" to a stranger who sneezes on the bus in return calls you names or even threatens you physically.
Just keep smiling and keep up the good work!

Saturday, January 15, 2005


I'm an idealist.
What are you?


Your answers suggest you are an Idealist

The four aspects that make up this personality type are: Spontaneous, Ideas, Hearts and Introvert

Summary of Idealists

  • Make sense of the world using inner values
  • Focus on personal growth and the growth of others
  • Think of themselves as bright, forgiving and curious
  • May sometimes appear stubborn

More about Idealists

Idealists put time and energy into developing personal values that they use as a guide through life. They may seek fulfilment by helping others improve themselves and often want to make the world a better place. Idealists only share their inner values with people they respect.

Idealists are the most likely group to say they are vegetarian, according to a UK survey.
Idealists enjoy discussions about a wide range of topics, particularly those that deal with the future. They are typically easy-going and flexible, but if their values are challenged they may refuse to compromise. In situations where they can’t use their talents or are unappreciated, Idealists may have trouble expressing themselves and withdraw. Under extreme stress, Idealists may become very critical of others, or lose confidence in their own ability to cope. Recognition for their work is important to Idealists; however, they are also good at spotting false praise.

Idealist Careers

Idealists are often drawn to jobs where they can help people reach their potential. They are also attracted to careers that allow artistic creativity.

Friday, January 07, 2005

ACLU Executive Director Anthony D. Romero released the memo Dec. 20 in New York. That document, a December 2003 FBI internal e-mail, suggests that Bush issued a secret Executive Order authorizing the use of extreme coercive measures in interrogation, including sleep deprivation, stress positions, attack dogs, and use of hoods to intimidate prisoners. The Geneva Convention Against Torture bans all of these practices.

Now that's a surprise! Apparently George Junior knew about the abuse of prisoners in the Abu Graib prison.
What do we call a president who uses torture as a means of staying in power, boys'n girls?

Just you wait till my son has seized power! But first he has to rest since he went ice-skating with me and my group yesterday and with his own group today. He's one happy and lucky kid. Did I tell you about the modeltrain he got from his grandfather, the other day? Neat stuff! We recently re-established contact after we hadn't seen one another since he and his daughter kicked me into seeing a doctor, about seven years ago. The argument started when he stated that Ferdinand would go to hell because I refused to have him baptised as a catholic. I responded that if heaven would be full of hypocrite people like him I'd pray for my son to go see the other guy. Grandpa was offended...

Sunday, January 02, 2005

More people die of starvation each and every week than the biggest tsunami in recorded history can kill in a day.
Of course it is mindboggling and more than awful what mother nature did in South-East Asia. Especially Indonesia has suffered sever losses and part of my family (on mothers side) is from there so it did shock us tremendously.
But why does the UN do so little te make an end to hunger? Why have the oilpiplines in Iraq been restored and do the people of Baghdad still don't have running water? Sources should be divided more evenly but as long as there are people who think they are entitled to have far more than others that remains an Utopia...

Between Christmas and the last day of the year my daughter Eva stayed with us. I'm hoping to see here more this year. With New Years Eve she was back at her moms and I was left with my son, my mom and my best friend. Not the worst of company one can imagine but I still missed my little girl...:-(

May justice rule in 2005.